You know how something is bad for you but you have to have it. Take chocolate for instance. You know you should only have one bite, just one small bite, and you take the bite and it's so good that you take another bite, and another. Before you know it, you’re sitting in your car debating, yet again, whether you should give him a call.
So I’ve been pretty busy and haven’t really had the chance to meet up with Chocolate Junior (CJ), but like I said before, he’s persistent. After a few weeks of playing catch up, me and CJ decided we would get together for breakfast. That ultimately turned into an early lunch. I decided to drive and pick him up for several reasons. So I get to his house and when he comes out I remember my initial attraction. This young boy is a real cutie. He gets in the car and our first official date begins, and I would be lying if I said it wasn’t one of the best I’ve been on in a while. His words are in bold.
Hey
Hey, dag I finally catch up with you!
I’m finally catching up with you.
How you been?
I’m good, how are you?
I’m good
So where do you want to go?
How about Marathon Grill? I think it’s one in Chestnut Hill(Whattttt??? What does he know about Marathon Grill? I’m impressed. That’s one of my favorite spots, so a point for him.)
So there’s casual conversation in the car that’s continuous and fun. Nothing forced and it was good; so good that we past Marathon Grill and he suggested another place…
We can go to Bruno’s. That’s straight up.
I never been but I’m open.
We get to Bruno’s and I’m even more impressed. It’s a cute, small restaurant in Chestnut Hill right up the street from Valley Green (and for family members reading this you know why this was an “awwww” moment). It has some outdoor seating, but we opt for the porch that gives you the outdoor feel without the heat and bees. Nothing fancy. Nothing major. Just cute and simple. It was absolutely the perfect place for a Sunday afternoon early lunch. Now, just so you know it’s the simple things that win me over.
Flashback moment…
The last guy I fell for read my horoscope before I had the chance to ask him if I could borrow the paper to read it myself. Afterwards, he told me to clean my nasty desk. The fact that he took the time to read my horoscope meant something to me.
The guy before that took me to see the moon. Now, I know that sounds corny, but I was actually looking at the moon before he picked me up and was saying to myself how nice it looked. I mean it was beautiful! Once he got there he said “did you see the moon tonight!” He had me.
Back to present…
So we sat, talked, made a bet, I lost ($5), talked, ate, made another bet (I got my $5 back), he told me his birthday was next month (Oct. 28th girlfriend!), but didn’t ask about my birthday (gasp! - lost a point!). He did cute stuff like reach over the table to take a piece of string off my shoulder, asked me if my food was ok, and touched the scratch on my arm and said “what happened?” (you know, sincere, like “aww-what happened”, but no homo) – stuff like that.
We finished eating, he paid, I offered to pay the tip, he said no, I said ok, we left, my car was hot as hell, I rolled down the windows, and we sat outside the ice cream place next door while the car cooled off and talked some more. We got in after it cooled off and left. I dropped him off at a corner store. We sat in the car a few more minutes, talked, made plans to go to Continental after I get off work one day (he went there one time and liked it, another one of my favorites – another point). We hugged, he told me to call him to let him know I got home safe (another point), he gets out the car and that’s when it happened…
Tell me why – WHY – a car pulls up immediately after he got out, he gets in, and you can tell he told the guy driving that he was with me because the guy sits up and looks in my direction, and then they pull off? What the EFF was that???!!!! I don’t even remember seeing him make a phone call to tell someone to meet him! Girlfriends, this young boy is still in the life. Damn, damn, damn!
This is bad, I mean really bad. See at this point, for me, it’s not only chocolate it’s chocolate with a caramel filling. Damn you bad boys with your bad ways, and your dark skin, and your good dates, and your young boy stamina!!!!
What’s a girl to do? I know. I know. Leave it alone! It’s trouble – I know! But guess what? I called him to let him know I got home ok…
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Saturday, September 13, 2008
It Is What It Is
Wow, I’m flattered, I really am. And I really do like you and enjoy the time we spend.
But a relationship? I don’t know.
Like I said, I do enjoy spending time with you and I like what we have. I just can’t see us holding hands while we walk down that relationship path. Yeah our conversations are good. Hahaha, yeah that’s good too, but that does not make the man or make me want to invest that type of time in you. I’m not being mean, I’m just being honest, like I would expect from you.
Why? Do you really want to know? I can’t see how that will help the situation, but at any rate here goes. But before I start know that I accept that this is you. Disappointment lies with false expectations, not realistic views. These are only things that made me think and things that I’ve found strange. I’m not judging you or your character, or asking you to change.
Only you can make those decisions.
Sometimes when I ask you questions your answers are somewhat vague. It’s like you’ve mastered the art of generalizing to keep your story straight. And remember when you went away that weekend and lost your cell phone on the way. I found it strange that it would still ring even though it wasn’t charged for days.
Oh and speaking of phones.
Remember that call you took in the other room from your boy in jail. I always wondered how prison life was like for a guy with a name like “Sharelle.” Yeah, you invited me to your family cookout and I had a good time, but when we met you said you had 4 sisters, and at the cookout you had nine.
And there were other things.
I never tripped or argued because I didn’t feel the need. You were doing your thing and I was doing me. I did however make not of your anecdote discrepancies, and of other things that would prevent you from being in a serious relationship with me. And I know I’m not perfect and I have some sh*t with me.
But hey, it is what it is.
But a relationship? I don’t know.
Like I said, I do enjoy spending time with you and I like what we have. I just can’t see us holding hands while we walk down that relationship path. Yeah our conversations are good. Hahaha, yeah that’s good too, but that does not make the man or make me want to invest that type of time in you. I’m not being mean, I’m just being honest, like I would expect from you.
Why? Do you really want to know? I can’t see how that will help the situation, but at any rate here goes. But before I start know that I accept that this is you. Disappointment lies with false expectations, not realistic views. These are only things that made me think and things that I’ve found strange. I’m not judging you or your character, or asking you to change.
Only you can make those decisions.
Sometimes when I ask you questions your answers are somewhat vague. It’s like you’ve mastered the art of generalizing to keep your story straight. And remember when you went away that weekend and lost your cell phone on the way. I found it strange that it would still ring even though it wasn’t charged for days.
Oh and speaking of phones.
Remember that call you took in the other room from your boy in jail. I always wondered how prison life was like for a guy with a name like “Sharelle.” Yeah, you invited me to your family cookout and I had a good time, but when we met you said you had 4 sisters, and at the cookout you had nine.
And there were other things.
I never tripped or argued because I didn’t feel the need. You were doing your thing and I was doing me. I did however make not of your anecdote discrepancies, and of other things that would prevent you from being in a serious relationship with me. And I know I’m not perfect and I have some sh*t with me.
But hey, it is what it is.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
OMG! - What Is That Smell?
Ok ladies. I’m about to go there. That place that we dare not go. That place that no one ever venture’s. Some things just deserve to be left alone. Some topics are just taboo. But I can no longer remain silent and I’m going in…
Ladies, what is the deal with our vaginas!
I’m just saying. It’s always something with that thing! Don’t front, you know what I’m talking about! I mean you may have, what, a good four days out the entire month where everything is running smooth with Miss Thang! Other than that, either you are experiencing symptoms because you are about to get your visit from aunt flow, aunt flow is visiting, or you are experiencing symptoms because aunt flow has left.
And don’t get me started on the ever-popular bacteria infection. Stop fronting!!! You know what I’m talking about. I decided during one of my trips to my GYN that I was fed up. I decided that my GYN was going to tell me what I need to do to stop these shenanigans once and for all. Here’s what her stank ass said…
• Try not to stress (I think this was the easiest of them all)
• Always wear panties with the white strip (no more Victoria Secret for me)
• Try to eat the right foods and stay away from unhealthy food (does that include organic cookies?)
• Avoid wearing clothes that are too tight (they make clothes that are not tight? Who knew?)
• Stay away from perfume or fragrance soaps (Ok, she is totally missing the point of using soap.)
• Always wear protection when having sex (by sex you mean….????)
• Avoid douching (I was just trying to do him a favor)
• Blah Blah Blah
What the EFFFFF!!!!! She knows half the stuff on that list is impossible. I mean come on – ALWAYS use protection?
And during those good days when things are running smoothly, have you ever explored Miss Thang. I mean, really explored. With a mirror and all. If not, you should. It’s the only way you’ll stop faking those orgasms. At any rate, is it just me? I mean, have you ever smelled your fingers afterwards? ILL!!!! That “essence,” as my GYN likes to call it, doesn’t exactly smell like that Bath and Body shower gel that you shouldn’t use. STOP FRONTIN’! YALL KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT.
Now look, I understand that things are a bit more complicated for us because our stuff is inside. But is it too much to ask for a month – ONE MONTH – where nothing is coming out of Miss Thang (well—almost nothing! See, that's why I have bacteria infections now!).
Is it too much to ask for one month free of maxi pads and panty liners without having to go to CVS for a home pregnancy test. Is it too much to ask for one month free of “guess that smell.” One month to use any soap I want. One month to wear all the Victoria Secret panties I want, in all the colors that I want. Just one month. Is that too much to ask?
Ladies, what is the deal with our vaginas!
I’m just saying. It’s always something with that thing! Don’t front, you know what I’m talking about! I mean you may have, what, a good four days out the entire month where everything is running smooth with Miss Thang! Other than that, either you are experiencing symptoms because you are about to get your visit from aunt flow, aunt flow is visiting, or you are experiencing symptoms because aunt flow has left.
And don’t get me started on the ever-popular bacteria infection. Stop fronting!!! You know what I’m talking about. I decided during one of my trips to my GYN that I was fed up. I decided that my GYN was going to tell me what I need to do to stop these shenanigans once and for all. Here’s what her stank ass said…
• Try not to stress (I think this was the easiest of them all)
• Always wear panties with the white strip (no more Victoria Secret for me)
• Try to eat the right foods and stay away from unhealthy food (does that include organic cookies?)
• Avoid wearing clothes that are too tight (they make clothes that are not tight? Who knew?)
• Stay away from perfume or fragrance soaps (Ok, she is totally missing the point of using soap.)
• Always wear protection when having sex (by sex you mean….????)
• Avoid douching (I was just trying to do him a favor)
• Blah Blah Blah
What the EFFFFF!!!!! She knows half the stuff on that list is impossible. I mean come on – ALWAYS use protection?
And during those good days when things are running smoothly, have you ever explored Miss Thang. I mean, really explored. With a mirror and all. If not, you should. It’s the only way you’ll stop faking those orgasms. At any rate, is it just me? I mean, have you ever smelled your fingers afterwards? ILL!!!! That “essence,” as my GYN likes to call it, doesn’t exactly smell like that Bath and Body shower gel that you shouldn’t use. STOP FRONTIN’! YALL KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT.
Now look, I understand that things are a bit more complicated for us because our stuff is inside. But is it too much to ask for a month – ONE MONTH – where nothing is coming out of Miss Thang (well—almost nothing! See, that's why I have bacteria infections now!).
Is it too much to ask for one month free of maxi pads and panty liners without having to go to CVS for a home pregnancy test. Is it too much to ask for one month free of “guess that smell.” One month to use any soap I want. One month to wear all the Victoria Secret panties I want, in all the colors that I want. Just one month. Is that too much to ask?
Monday, September 1, 2008
With Life Comes Life
This morning I was listening to The Best of Steve Harvey, and they were discussing “quit” moments. These were powerful and motivating stories where they described a moment where they were at the brink of quitting and giving up on their dreams. Although this is so cliché, it truly reminded me how important it is to never give.
This thing called life is truly a scary, yet motivating experience. We all have aspired to be something amazing. Whether it was as a child, as a teenager, or as an adult, at some point in our lives we dream and dream big. However, the harsh reality is that with life comes life. With the good, there’s the bad, and often the bad is so overwhelming and so much more realistic than the good, that we believe that’s all it’s ever going to be. Our faith is compromised, our beliefs are tainted, and our dreams are just that – a dream that continues to live in our minds and as we sleep, but never become a part of our lives.
As women we often make other things and people a priority, which makes it that much easier to give up on our own aspirations and dreams. That’s who we are. We are nurturing individuals and we’ll give 200% to someone else if we had to, and all the while not even investing 2% in ourselves.
We have all experienced that quit moment, and some of us, including myself, have surrendered to that moment. We believe that it’s just too hard, or just too much for us to handle. That it’s so much easier to give in – to give up. Or is it?
Girlfriends! giving up is probably harder than succeeding. When you give up, it’s admitting to yourself that you are not capable of doing something, and that in itself weighs heavy on your mind and spirit. It doesn’t help when you come from an environment where everyone around you has given up. Again you began to believe that this is the true reality. That giving up and being less than what you are capable of being is all that there is. But with life comes life. With the bad, there is also the good. Realizing your true potential and working your way through to seeing your dream become a reality is one of the most rewarding parts of life. Yes their will be boulders, broken bridges, and brick walls in your path, but always continue to move forward and never stop trying to turn your dream into a reality. Take a break, step back, but never give up.
Here are a few songs under my iTune “Inspiration” folder that always help me when I’m feeling a little defeated. Hope they can do the same for my Girlfriends!
This thing called life is truly a scary, yet motivating experience. We all have aspired to be something amazing. Whether it was as a child, as a teenager, or as an adult, at some point in our lives we dream and dream big. However, the harsh reality is that with life comes life. With the good, there’s the bad, and often the bad is so overwhelming and so much more realistic than the good, that we believe that’s all it’s ever going to be. Our faith is compromised, our beliefs are tainted, and our dreams are just that – a dream that continues to live in our minds and as we sleep, but never become a part of our lives.
As women we often make other things and people a priority, which makes it that much easier to give up on our own aspirations and dreams. That’s who we are. We are nurturing individuals and we’ll give 200% to someone else if we had to, and all the while not even investing 2% in ourselves.
We have all experienced that quit moment, and some of us, including myself, have surrendered to that moment. We believe that it’s just too hard, or just too much for us to handle. That it’s so much easier to give in – to give up. Or is it?
Girlfriends! giving up is probably harder than succeeding. When you give up, it’s admitting to yourself that you are not capable of doing something, and that in itself weighs heavy on your mind and spirit. It doesn’t help when you come from an environment where everyone around you has given up. Again you began to believe that this is the true reality. That giving up and being less than what you are capable of being is all that there is. But with life comes life. With the bad, there is also the good. Realizing your true potential and working your way through to seeing your dream become a reality is one of the most rewarding parts of life. Yes their will be boulders, broken bridges, and brick walls in your path, but always continue to move forward and never stop trying to turn your dream into a reality. Take a break, step back, but never give up.
Here are a few songs under my iTune “Inspiration” folder that always help me when I’m feeling a little defeated. Hope they can do the same for my Girlfriends!
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